He is in Control

So, things have been rather up and down and all around lately.

About a week or so back, we had gotten news that mom and dad might be going to Ukraine as early as September 4th, and started nearly bouncing off the walls trying to get everything all planned out before then.

I personally was excited and nervous, but was reminded of how long we’ve been praying for God’s perfect timing in this adoption. If this was when it was going to be, then that was the perfect timing, and we could trust that, trust Him.

But then, a few days later, we got another message. There were problems with some of the paperwork that hadn’t been spotted before. It would have to be redone, and due to the time it would take to get those papers signed and sent again, other paperwork was going to expire and have to be redone as well.

Suddenly, we’re back to having no idea what the timing will be.

Despite all of this, I continue to remind myself that there is one thing that we always can depend on:
God is in control. He is. Even when we have no idea what’s going on, He has it all in His hands.

~thisbigsister

Happy Birthday to My Little Sister

I’ve had this post/message floating around in my head since July 6th, Farah’s birthday. Some of you know about her, some don’t. She was my little sister after Samuel. Farah had trisomy 13, and died almost exactly one hour after she was born. Fair warning, I cried while writing this, so no guarantees you won’t cry as well.

Dear Farah Joy,

My little JoyJoy, I can’t believe you would already be four years old this month! Time has flown by so fast, but we still have that gap in the kids – the missing spot where you would fit so perfectly.

I still remember the times I got to feel your sweet little feet kicking, as you practiced karate in mom’s belly. 🙂 Those moments when you were so full of life, for those, oh so short, nine months.

I still remember when mom left to go to the hospital, but we still hoped you would be able to stay here on earth with us, even for just a few years.

I still remember driving to the hospital at 11pm, with Nana and Alyssa, rushing to try and see you for just a few moments before you left us. Honestly, I was heartbroken that I never got to look into your sweet little eyes, but I was still thankful to hold you as your heart continued to beat, ever more slowly.

I still remember the moment the nurse said your heart had stopped beating, and it felt like mine stopped too.

I still remember looking at you in that small white box, just laying there. I put a tiny pink and green friendship bracelet on you, and kept a matching piece, just so I would still have a connection to you.

I still remember the blur of people going by, hugs and handshakes, trying to show their love and support, while I tried to hold back my tears.

I still remember crying as we sang over your little coffin, saying goodnight, and goodbye….. those used to be our three bedtime songs, but now I can’t sing that set without choking up, and getting tears in my eyes again.

And I still remember all the JOY God has brought through your short life. Even now, four years later, people are still being blessed, and God is being glorified. There’s a pretty little fountain down in Peru that has your name on a plaque, recognizing that God used you to bless all of them there.

I love you Farah Joy, and I can’t wait to see you again, and look into those beautiful eyes for the very first time.

~thisbigsister

Summer Mercies

Honestly, I don’t even know where to start… It’s been a crazy summer so far, and I doubt it’ll be slowing down for a while yet.

As time continues to pass by, I keep wondering when, or even IF, we’ll get to bring these three sweet children home. I want to be able to hold them, and nurture them, and show them love.

And yet, they’re still not here. Paperwork keeps having to be redone, as a signature here is wrong, or the date there isn’t right.

It’s so frustrating sometimes as we wait, and wait, and wait…..

But there are several passages we’ve been studying (for the Bible Bee), that have made me think of the kiddos…. and gave/give me peace for them.

In Psalm 145:9 (and many other verses), we’re told,
“The LORD is good to all, and His tender mercies are over all His works.

He is good, and merciful, and He loves and cares for Yuri, Viktor and Christina. We can trust Him to care for them, and to work all things out in His perfect timing.

~thisbigsister

Mobilizing & “To Be Safe”

I sometimes have things I want to post when I’m nowhere near my laptop, so I have now downloaded the WordPress app onto my iPad – don’t know how often I’ll post anyway, but I like having the option.

This is my test post for the app, so I don’t have any planned brilliance to share this time. 😉 However, I would like to share a verse which our family has memorized for the 2014 National Bible Bee.

The name of the Lord is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is safe. Proverbs 18:10

The first bunch of times I read that verse, I remember thinking, “yeah, that’s great and all, but it’s only for the righteous.”

Thankfully though, we kept repeating it as we memorized it, and I recently connected some dots.

I AM righteous, in Jesus! So yes, I CAN run to the name of the Lord and be safe. 🙂

Just a sweet thought in my day.

~thisbigsister

“Oh Look At The Time!”

~ Just a short post, inspired by some thoughts I had this afternoon. ~

As the days continue to flow by, as the clock ticks ever on, one question that is always being asked: “When?”.

Right now, one “when” that’s often in our minds is, “When do we get to bring Yuri, Viktor, and Christina here?”.

Thankfully, we don’t need to worry about it, and we can instead bring that question often to God, trusting Him and His timing, but even so, I know I still catch myself thinking and planning, actually wasting the current moments, while thinking of those to come.

So what if we just loved each other in the now?

Loving God, and loving others…. on these two hang ALL the rest. Time could cease to exist, and yet still, Love.

 

~ thisbigsister

There IS a family

About a month ago, i guess, I saw a link to this blog post on my facebook feed.

http://therebelution.com/blog/2013/08/help-viktor-and-yuri-get-adopted/#.UjxhOcZQErU

I remember seeing the picture, and the title, but to be honest, I didn’t even click on the link. I mean, I didn’t have any connection to these people, what could I do? It’s not like WE were going to adopt the kids!

Well, so much for that thought! Mom saw the post a day or two later, and started talking about it all the time. I still didn’t think anything would come of it that would really involve me very much, maybe we’d raise some money for them – I could make some hair bows and beaded socks to sell, maybe bake a couple hundred cookies – nothing we hadn’t done before. But though we are now raising money for an adoption, it’s for our own. 🙂

Mom and Dad began discussing how well we were set up to adopt a child with special needs. With Dad in the Army, we’ve got fine medical coverage, and a steady income, and we’ve had some experience with special needs with Talyah since she has down syndrome. Also, we’ve got three teenagers in the house now – plenty able to help Mom with running the house and keeping up on things. 🙂

Once Mom and Dad made the decision to go ahead with the adoption, everything started moving along quite quickly . We got in contact with a bunch of people we’ll need along the way, and actually just had our home study this morning.

So to answer a line from that blog post, “there is no family.”, well, there IS a family. It’s us.

~ thisbigsister